Monday, April 12, 2010

Riding Fences

My back is sore.  My hands are sore.  My head is sore.  My ass is sore.  I left the house at around 9:00 AM and didn’t step foot in it again until 5:00 PM.  My goal was to both replace the broken split rail fence and remove the holly bushes from the front of the house.  The kids and I ended up spending the whole day working on the fence.  The kids were a big help, they were the runners, getting tools from the garage and shed, refilling water bottles, removing staples, raking leaves, etc. 

The savior of the day was our neighbor, Dave.  Dave and I share the fence that was in need of repair and he appeared like an angel while we were taking the new posts and rails off of the truck.  Together we removed all of the old fence and chicken wire and put up the new one. 

Dave showed me a really cool trick for removing the stubs of the fence posts that are still buried in the ground.  This trick requires two people and two shovels or digging bars.  Dig on opposite sides of the buried post until you can place the shovel at a 45 degree or higher angle to the post (not to the ground).  Both people dig the blades of their shovel or digging bar into the post on opposite sides and slowly, very slowly, apply downward pressure on the shovel handle.  With a little luck, the post will slowly come out of the ground.  Be careful not to push too hard on the shovel handle or it will snap off or rip a chunk of the post out of the ground causing you to get a new shovel or dig more to find a better place to bite into the post.

We successfully removed all 7 posts this way with only one broken shovel.  The shovel’s handle snapped and severely bent the steel shank, so it had to be put to rest.  It was an old shovel, but will be missed.  The rest of the day consisted of clamming out the post holes and setting the rails.  We left the most difficult set of rails until the end, the set that had to trimmed down to fit in a shortened space.  We used my handy DeWalt reciprocating saw for that.

Sounds pretty easy right?  So why am I so sore?  It is because I have reached the level of outta-shapedness that is reserved for the bedridden and the guys from the computer labs in college.  You know the ones who spend 48+ hours in the same chair, only leaving to relieve themselves and to refill their supply of soda and snacks.  The ones who redefine body odor as a physical shield that encompasses a 15 diameter sphere around them.  The ones surrounded by empty Mountain Dew cans and snack size Doritos bags.  I don’t know if these people still exist, but they did 14 years ago and I imagine that they still might be sitting there.  This winter of inactivity really had a negative impact on me, I have gone flabby and weak.

My 5 YO is also suffering the unfortunate result of spending the entire day outside.  He came down to breakfast this morning looking like he went 10 rounds with Apollo Creed.  Both eyes were swollen and he was barely able to open them.  I resisted the urge to cut him with everything I had, and gave him eye drops instead.

In other news, the kids got a new swing to replace one that had broken last week.  The baby also got a new swing which she loved.  We also acquired an 80lb. heavy bag which hasn’t been hung up yet.  Maybe I can combine that with the elliptical trainer in the garage and get myself into some semblance of physical fitness or just continue to sit in front of the computer all day and night long.

No comments:

Post a Comment